Wednesday, 21 December 2011


Well, the cancer clinic was as dire as I thought it would be.  It was the closest I have come to crying in clinic, which I know is totally inappropriate, but I had to look away and steal myself to stop a tear rolling down my cheek.  A patient came in with their sons and was told that the headache and cough they'd had for the last couple of weeks wasn't a head cold like their GP had told them but a met from lung cancer they also didn't know they had.  They have weeks left.  They joked if they'd have known they would go like this, they wouldn't have stopped drinking all those years ago.  The GP had told them once the headaches had gone they'd do something about helping them quite smoking.  It took a good while for the patient to decide if they even wanted a diagnosis.  That seems alien to me.  Is it better to not know?  To not have a name to call the evil you have to try to fight?  Not knowing would be worse for me.  Funny how different people are. 

I've moved home for the two weeks of christmas holidays.  I am working full tim at the surgery, and spending the rest of my time on my knees trying to find the balls that my cat has lost.  I'm trying to show her I'm the magic ball finding lady, not the terrifying lady she thinks I am at the moment.  She's forgotten the hours we spent under the sofa together and runs away from me now.  Which is doublly sad because I am normally one of those crazy cat ladies/cat whisperer that has cats follow them home and roll over for tummy tickles the first time they see me.  Not my own cat though. 

New Year's is all booked for me and mr to see the fireworks on the embankment in London again.  It will be our third year.  Not sure what we're doing in the daytime yet but train tickets, hotel, restaurant vouchers from tescos points all booked and sorted.  I can't wait.  It's a little sad, but in some ways I'm looking forward to that more than Christmas.  I was trying to find a Christmas card for him, but all the couples card's kept saying about how special it was to spend Christmas with your loved one and how magic they make the day.  One day.  I hope you've all bought the Military Wives Choir song, it should def be Christmas Number 1. 

Hope you're all having a nice break for Christmas and those interviews and offers are rolling in.  Good luck and Happy Christmas!

1 comment:

brokenangel said...

Same with the one day xmas thoughts only I wont ever get it, bloody parents! Tho its my brother 1st xmas not in a war zone for 3years whooot, just keep thinking one day his tours will fall in line for you to spend it together

Hope the single gets to number one for all those service men and woman out their this xmas.